Girls' Stuff

Common concerns:

Girls have lots of different concerns and anxieties when they are going through puberty, this is perfectly normal.

How do I look?

When you are a teenager your body goes through a lot of changes and it is common to compare yourself to others. There are probably times when you wish you were taller/thinner/didn’t wear glasses/didn’t have a brace/had no spots/ had perfect skin. There may be things you want to change about yourself, this is normal, many people feel this way. But in time you will learn to like yourself the way you are.

As a girl’s body changes to a woman’s she will get taller, her hips will get broader and her thighs and bum will get bigger. This is all normal. The average size of a British woman is size 14. A lot of young women feel they are overweight; often this is not true, and they may feel pressure to look a certain way by influences from the television, popstars and models in magazines. This means than many women feel guilty when they eat – often they stop eating things they enjoy.

Eating chips, cakes, chocolate and crisps is fine – you just need to eat them occasionally and eat other foods as well so a balanced diet is achieved, for example, by eating fresh fruit and vegetables. Regular exercise is also very important to keep to a healthy lifestyle.

Being very worried about your weight can cause health problems –physical and / or psychological. If you are really concerned about what you eat or your weight then you should seek help, for example a doctor or nurse.

Breasts

Many girls and women worry about their breasts (or ‘boobs’). Concerns are often about the size of them – ‘are they big enough?’ ‘will they grow more?’ ‘why is one bigger than the other?’ these are all common questions. Breasts come in different shapes and sizes and can be small or large, soft or firm, nipples may point out, be inverted (going in), be dark or pale. These differences are all very common and quite normal. Girls need to make sure they get a bra that fits properly. Some shops offer a free measuring service to ensure a bra fits right. It’s important to get measured regularly too, as boobs can change size, especially you put on weight or loose weight.

Body Hair

During puberty, the body starts to grow extra hair – this is perfectly normal. Pubic hair around the genitals usually appears first, then hair grows in the armpits, on the legs and sometimes on other parts of the body. Some women choose to remove some of it by shaving, waxing or by using creams and others don’t. It should be up to the individual as to what they decide and feel comfortable to do with their body hair – it is a matter of choice.

Genitals

Some people get very embarrassed about talking about their genitals, but there is really no need.

It’s really important to encourage girls and young women to get to know their genitals - what their functions are and what they look like – they are an important part of the body. Not all women’s genitals are the same – they all slightly vary in appearance.

Women’s genitals are made up of different parts – the clitoris, the outer lips (labia majora), the inner lips (labia minora), the vagina and the urethra (where the wee comes out). The correct word to describe all these parts and to describe the outside of women’s genitals is the ‘vulva’. The outer lips cover the clitoris and go back towards the anus. The outer lips are thicker and darker and often have hair on the outside. When a woman is sexually aroused they open up to reveal the entrance to the vagina.

The inner lips join at the front in a small fleshy bump called the clitoris. The only purpose of the clitoris is to give a woman pleasure. A woman can give herself pleasure by stroking or rubbing her clitoris, sometimes this may lead to an orgasm. The inner lips are thinner. They vary in colour from light pink to dark brown. One outer lip may be bigger than the other or the inner lips may hang below the outer lips.

Cervical smear

This is a test offered to all women aged 25 and above, every 3-5 years. A cervical smear test can show the warning signs before cervical cancer develops. The test can be uncomfortable but it doesn’t hurt and it only takes a couple of seconds and it is important that it is done. A doctor or nurse can do the test.

Menstrual Cycle

This is the process in which an egg develops and is released, and the lining of the womb is prepared for a possible pregnancy. The lining of the womb is then shed, as a period if a woman doesn’t get pregnant. These events are caused by hormones – chemical messages which travel around the body in the blood stream.

The menstrual cycle is from the first day of a period until the day before the next period starts. The length of the menstrual cycle varies – it can be as short as 21 days or as long as 40 days.

On average it will be about 28 days. While the period is happening, about 20 eggs start to ripen in the ovary, although only one of these will finally be released at ovulation. A short time after this the hormone oestrogen causes a new womb lining to start to thicken in preparation for a fertilised egg. It also causes the mucus in the cervix to become thinner and more stretchy, allowing sperm to pass through the cervix more easily and swim to the egg.

Ovulation is when an egg is released from an ovary. In all cycles, regardless of how long or short they are, ovulation will always happen around 12-16 days before the start of the next period. It is the time from the first day of the period to ovulation that can change. Ovulation occurs in most, but not all cycles. Occasionally, more than one egg is released which, if fertilised, can lead to a multiple pregnancy such as twins. Once the egg has been released, it travels down the fallopian tube to the womb.

Ovulation triggers the production of a second hormone, progesterone. This prepares the womb lining even more, ensuring that it’s spongy and thick and full of nutrients so that a fertilised egg can settle or implant into it. After ovulation the mucus in the cervix goes back to being thick and sticky. If the egg is not fertilised it will be reabsorbed naturally, the level of hormones drops, and this menstrual cycle comes to an end. The cycle then begins again with the womb lining breaking down and being shed through the vagina as a period.

Period Facts!

• At birth a woman has between 1-2 million eggs in her ovaries but by the time she reaches puberty she will have less than half that amount.
• An egg is less than 1/10 of the size of a full stop – invisible to the naked eye!
• Periods usually start when a girl is aged 12 or 13, but it could be as young as 8 or as old as 17.
• The average amount of menstrual blood lost in a whole period is 3 – 5 tablespoons.
• A period usually lasts from between 3 and 7 days.
• Period blood is often thick and reddish brown and may have small lumps in it – especially at the start of the period. It can smell but this is only when it comes into contact with the air. This is why it is important to change the towel or tampon regularly.
• When girls first have periods the time between one period and the next may vary so it can be difficult to know exactly when the next one will be. It is normal that it may take a while for the menstrual cycle to become regular. By recording period’s on a calender or in a diary, it will help work out when the next period is due.

Living With Periods

Changes in hormone levels can affect moods. A few days before the period is due a woman may feel moody and tearful and her breasts may become tender or get larger and she may get some spots on her face. Periods are often accompanied with pain and some women experience this more than others. The pain is due to large contractions of the womb muscle. This can be really frustrating and even upsetting. Holding a hot water bottle against the stomach and taking painkillers may help ease the pain. Taking the combined pill can help painful periods, but there are other alternatives – seek advice from a doctor or nurse.

Young women often get anxious about putting a tampon in for the first time – they fear it will hurt, but it shouldn’t if they are relaxed. There are instructions that come with them to make sure they are put in right. If the tampon feels uncomfortable it may not be in far enough. Some women find using some extra lubricant (like K-Y jelly) helps the tampon to be inserted. Towels or tampons can be used during a period (or sometimes women alternate between these)– one method isn’t better than the other – it should be up to the individual to decide which she feels more comfortable using.

Toxic Shock Syndrome (TSS) is a rare condition associated with tampon use resulting in a type of blood poisoning. Two or more of the following symptoms may be signs of it: being sick; a rash; sore throat; sudden fever; diarrhoea. So if a young woman experiences any of these and is concerned about TSS – she should stop using tampons and seek medical advice immediately.

Myths About Periods

There are lots of myths about periods and what a woman should or shouldn’t do when she has a period. It should be an individual decision what she does when she has a period. It may take some time to get used to having periods and feeling confident living with them. But periods are a normal, healthy part of being female and they shouldn’t stop her from doing things she enjoys – such as playing sport or swimming.

A female is most likely to get pregnant around ovulation - the middle of the menstrual cycle, as this is the most fertile time, however ovulation can vary each month so it makes it hard to know exactly when ovulation occurs. Sperm can also live in the female body for around five days after sex, so pregnancy is possible at virtually any time in the menstrual cycle. Men produce around 300 million sperm when they ejaculate and just one sperm is enough to get someone pregnant!

Changes in the genital area

"I’m really worried there is something wrong with me – I keep getting sticky stuff in my knickers" Young woman (15)

Discharge from the vagina is normal and this natural lubricant keeps the vagina healthy. This discharge is usually clear or slightly milky. When a female is sexually excited her vagina produces a natural lubricant to make sex easier. The amount of discharge increases around ovulation. Thick discharge that itches and/or smells may be a sign of an infection. This could be thrush, a very common infection in women, which can be caused by wearing tight clothes, using perfumed soap or bubble bath or just by feeling run down. If a woman has had unprotected sex she may have caught a sexually transmitted infection. Whatever the cause it can be easily treated. Advice from a doctor or nurse should be sought if there are concerns.

"It really burns when I go to the toilet, what is causing this?" Young woman (16)

It may be cystitis. Cystitis is an inflammation of the bladder or urethra and it is very common, especially amongst women. Symptoms are that you feel you need to go to the toilet all the time even when your bladder is empty and it may sting or burn when passing urine. It can be caused by bruising during sex or from bacteria from the anus being transferred to the urethra. This is why it is advisable for a girl / woman always wipes herself from front to back when going to the toilet. It is also advisable to drink a plenty of fluids. If cystitis symptoms persist it is advisable to seek medical advice.

Pressure

"My boyfriend says I’m frigid because I don’t want to have sex yet". Young woman (17)

It is everyone’s right to say "no" to sex or intimacy if it’s not what they want – it also should be an individual decision when the time is right for sex. Being called frigid is insulting, if her boyfriend really cared about her he would wait and respect what she wanted. If he still hassles her then he is just putting pressure on her and that is wrong Sex should be enjoyable, so advice could be:

• Don’t have sex until you’re absolutely sure it’s what you want.
• Leave partners who try to pressure you or insult you.
• Realise that sex will be pleasurable but only with the right partner at the right time and in the right place.
  

  Some people choose to wait until they are married to have sex, and this should be respected too.

Sexuality

"I fancy my friend – am I gay?" Young woman (16)

Fancying someone of the same sex is very common and doesn’t necessarily mean someone is gay. A woman (of any age) may be sexually attracted to other women – or to women and men, and this may change over a lifetime. It should be an individual decision and choice and this should be respected. If a young person wants advice and support about issues around sexuality such as ‘coming out’ there are local agencies, such as ALLSORTS, that can offer this, as well as offering education and support to parents and professionals.

Masturbation

"What is masturbation and is it wrong?" Young woman (14)

Masturbation is something many people do not talk about, but most people do it, at least at some point in their lives. Women may rub around or on their clitoris and maybe move fingers in and out of the vagina. It is possible to masturbate to orgasm – where the muscles in the vagina will move in spasms and feelings of pleasure flow through the whole body. Many women fantasise while they masturbate. Women who have learnt what they like can pass this knowledge on to a partner.

People shouldn’t feel guilty about exploring their own body, there is no risk of pregnancy, STI or risk of a broken heart! Some people masturbate alone or with a partner, it’s a personal choice whether to do it at all.

The Female Orgasm 

For all you need to know, see this link:

http://sexperienceuk.channel4.com/education/about/female-orgasm

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