Vaginal discharge / getting wet

Discharge from the vagina is normal and this natural lubricant keeps the vagina healthy. This discharge is usually clear or slightly milky. When a female is sexually excited, her vagina produces a natural lubricant to make sex easier. The amount of discharge increases around ovulation.

Thick discharge that itches and/or smells may be a sign of an infection. This could be thrush, a very common infection in women, which can be caused by wearing tight clothes, using perfumed soap or bubble bath or just by feeling run down.

If you have had unprotected sex, you may have caught a sexually transmitted infection. You should see a GP immediately if you notice any changes to your discharge.

Burning when peeing

If you experience burning when you urinate, you could have an inflammation of the bladder or urethra called cystitis. This is very common, especially among women.

Symptoms are that you feel you need to go to the toilet all the time even when your bladder is empty and it may sting or burn when passing urine. It can be caused by bruising during sex, or from bacteria from the anus being transferred to the urethra. This is why it is advisable to always wipe yourself from front to back when going to the loo, and to urinate immediately after sex. It is also advisable to drink a plenty of fluids. If cystitis symptoms persist, seek medical advice.

Saying no to sex before you are ready

It is everyone’s right to say ‘no’ to sex or intimacy if it’s not what they want – it should be an individual decision when the time is right for sex. If your partner truly cares about you, he or she will respect the decisions you make regarding when you are ready to have sex, and when you are not.

Putting pressure on someone to have sex is wrong. Sex should be enjoyable, so the advice is:never have sex until you’re absolutely sure it’s what you want leave partners who try to pressure you into sex, or insult you when you say you are not ready sex will be pleasurable but only with the right partner at the right time in the right place Some people choose to wait until they are married to have sex, and this should be respected too.

Have a look at our 'Are you ready?' leaflet [PDF 171kb] which helps you to think about the questions you can ask yourself! 

Am I gay?

Fancying someone of the same sex is very common and doesn’t necessarily mean you are gay. A woman (of any age) may be sexually attracted to other women – or to women and men, and this may change over a lifetime. It is an individual decision and choice which should be respected. If a young person wants advice and support about issues around sexuality such as ‘coming out’ there are local agencies, such as ALLSORTS, that can offer this, as well as offering education and support to parents and professionals.

For more information, see our LGBT pages. 

Is masturbating wrong?

Masturbation is something many people do not talk about, but most people do, at least at some point in their lives. Women may rub around or on their clitoris and maybe move fingers in and out of the vagina. It is possible to masturbate to orgasm – where the muscles in the vagina will move in spasms and feelings of pleasure flow through the whole body. Many women fantasise while they masturbate. Women who have learnt what they like can pass this knowledge on to a partner.

People shouldn’t feel guilty about exploring their own body, there is no risk of pregnancy, STIs, or a broken heart! Some people masturbate alone, and others might sometimes masturbate with a partner. Whether you do it or not - and when - is a personal choice, and you should never feel guilty about the time you spend enjoying yourself and exploring what works for you!  

Please feel free to contact us at swish@brighton-hove.gov.uk with your questions or comments.